Nothing like having a bandaid on your finger and trying to type normally to keep you humble, am I right? That’s my life right now. You know when you get something underneath your fingernail and it goes too far under the nail bed and it hurts worse than if you actually cut yourself or something? That happened yesterday to this finger- I think it was a piece of turmeric. I don’t know how that happens but I hate it. And I had to put a bandaid on it so I wouldn’t keep hitting it up against things.
Hopefully my fingernail will at least reap the health benefits of having a piece of turmeric shoved underneath it. New health craze alert!
Now that you’re all thoroughly grossed out and bored- let’s change gears and talk about music and this month.
This month. Woof.
All. the. emotions.
Things have continued to be difficult with my Mom/parents/family. In some ways things have escalated- only reaffirming that I’ve been making the right decisions in not tolerating bad behavior. It all weighs so heavy on me and sometimes I can get by without drowning in all of it- but sometimes I sink and feel dead because of it. There have been a few moments this month where I just wanted to find a job on the other side of the country, move there, and start a new life effective immediately.
Running away would only make things worse though. Instead, I must stay and embrace the positives. I’ve been doing this journaling activity inspired by Katie Dalebout. Basically, you list the things about your life that you’re happy with and number them. Then you make a list of the things you’d like to change and number them. For every thing you’d wish to change, you then go back and add that many to the list of things you’re happy about. It’s a way to practice gratitude and really focus on the good. It seems silly. But it really helps put you in a better place mentally.
Things I’m happy about (from a recent list):
- Warmer weather
- Feeling like I’m getting better (slowly, but still better) health wise
- My sister Angie is graduating high school next week and she’s just amazing
- Will bought us an air conditioner and so now I can love the warm weather even more
- It’s finally comfortable to ride my bike to work pretty much every day
- I have a couple of really fun concerts coming up (Chvrches and Beyonce)
- The support from my extended family, siblings, and Will
- I finally paid this hospital bill that I’ve been trying to pay over the phone but never got off hold in order to do so
- My Dad’s birthday was yesterday, father’s day is coming up, and it’s just nice to have a parent that I don’t have drama with (baggage, yes, but drama, no)
- I’m going to Jason Varitek bobblehead night at Fenway
- I have organic cherries in my fridge for the first time this season
- Will and I are going to London in March!!!
So I’m not going to lie- some of the songs on this playlist are sad and might make you cry. This playlist is super folksy and relatively melancholy. As you progress through the playlist, the tunes get more upbeat. You have to get through the rough and tough in order to see the light and feel at peace. That’s sort of how I built this playlist.
There are a lot of throwback songs that I’ve loved for a very long time and that I go back to whenever I need them emotionally (see: James Taylor, Joni Mitchell, Bob Dylan, and Fleetwood Mac).
I could have put the entirety of Sufjan Steven’s album Carrie and Lowell on here honestly, but that wouldn’t make a very good playlist now would it.
And then there are some newbies- hey Andrew Bird, Damien Jurado, The War on Drugs, RHCP, and Jack Garratt! I actually heard about Jack Garratt from my sister Angie. She shared this song that she loves by him and now I love it too.
I had to put Weston Road Flows from Drake’s new album solely because when he references, What are thoooose!, It makes me laugh.
The playlist name comes from the last two songs on the playlist. If you were to ask me what my favorite “Dreams” song was… I’d run away because I’m unable to answer that. I love both of these immensely.
I wish I was sharing something more fun right before memorial day weekend, but here we are. Hopefully if you’re in a place similar to mine, this playlist will work wonders for you.
As you can see from the screenshot above, I’m currently listening to the playlist. I’m sitting out on my balcony in the nice 70 degree weather. Photo evidence below. Excuse the bed hair. Note the bandaid on my middle finger.